Review: Finale by Becca Fitzpatrick

Book: Finale
Author: Becca Fitzpatrick
Series: Hush, Hush
Publication Date: October 23rd, 2012
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Rating: 1 Star

Will love conquer all?

Nora and Patch thought their troubles were behind them. Hank is gone and they should be able to put his ugly vendetta to rest. But in Hank's absence, Nora has become the unwitting head of the Nephilim and must finish what Hank began. Which ultimately means destroying the fallen angels - destroying Patch.

Nora will never let that happen, so she and Patch make a plan: lead everyone to believe they have broken up, and work the system from the inside. Nora will convince the Nephilim that they are making a mistake in fighting the fallen angels, and Patch will find out everything he can from the opposing side. They will end this war before it can even begin.

But the best-laid plans often go awry. Nora is put through the paces in her new role and finds herself drawn to an addictive power she never anticipated.

As the battle lines are drawn, Nora and Patch must confront the differences that have always been between them and either choose to ignore them or let them destroy the love they have always fought for.

It's been a long time since I've read a truly horrible book. The last time was Silence, I think. I just can't fathom why people would like this book. I have to admit that I didn't think it was that bad when I read Hush, Hush, or even Crescendo. Then the plot began becoming a clusterfuck of deux ex machina and random characters, and Nora continued her insufferable behavior.

Unlike many of my other wise fellow reviewers, I don't have that big of a problem with Patch. I can understand that he's a depraved character, and he should be thrown in jail for all his rapaciousness. But he doesn't manage to piss me off like Nora does, probably because I'm not following his train of thought. He's just a normal, hormonal male. Which is sexist of me, but what's there to expect when there are authors like Becca Fitzpatrick who write characters who wear all black, drive motorcycles, and kiss with "black fire"? You're just begging me to refer to men as chauvinistic pigs who only want a good lay.

So let's talk about what really pissed me off about this book, and what pissed me off in the last three books, too: Nora Grey. Exactly what sort of character development has she undergone in the past four books? She's the same, immature girl stalker as she was in the first book, except now she's controlling an army. What kind of idiot would give control of his army over to her, anyway? For all his supposed brilliance, Hank Millar wasn't very wise in naming a successor. Nora is exceedingly dull, and I didn't even realize she was a redhead until the last part of the book O.O Somehow, I missed that. Anyway, she uses everyone and is stupidly obsessed with Patch. She even pulls a Bella towards the last chapter by refusing to get out of bed and going into momentary depression because Patch is gone. And Fitzpatrick even draws from Kagawa with the whole vow thing they exchange at the end of the book, except it was way cheesier and vomit-inducing.

Also, authors, please, please stop giving your heroines/heroes a momentary bout of adrenaline that allowed them to defeat the invincible enemy just because one of his/her friends died. It worked before. It made sense in Vampire Academy. It made sense in The Mortal Instruments (I think it happened there...) But here, it was just laughable because of how utterly pathetic Nora was. Her voice was just so... immature. Her best friend, Vee, exists as a way to compare Nora's nice legs with Vee's rotundness (all those donuts that Nora likes to mention, I'd imagine), and PMS is just a way for her to excuse all bitchiness. I couldn't see how any rational human being--or supernatural creature--would ever designate Nora to any big role. She should've just been a dull, sideline character instead of the main event.

I won't even get started on the side characters. They were all almost comically evil, especially Dante. And Pepper. What kind of archangel is named Pepper? It just... Rarely do names bother me enough that I can't read the book, but this one definitely did. I kept thinking of Ms. Pepper Pots from Iron Man. And what role did the Nephilim play? They followed them brainlessly. I would've thought they'd be smarter than that. And Blakely, too... Ugh. I can't even give cohesive opinions on any of them because Nora was whoring up the big screen most of the time. They were all just conveniently there for her to order around. Also, I maintain that demoncraft is the most idiotic plot device ever invented. And now I am done. With this review, and with this entire, STUPID series. I FINISHED! What a bittersweet survival.



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Review: Sweet Evil by Wendy Higgins

Book: Sweet Evil 

Author: Wendy Higgins
Series: Sweet Trilogy
Publication Date: May 1st, 2012
Publisher: HarperTeen
Rating: 1 Star

Embrace the Forbidden

What if there were teens whose lives literally depended on being bad influences?

This is the reality for sons and daughters of fallen angels.

Tenderhearted Southern girl Anna Whitt was born with the sixth sense to see and feel emotions of other people. She’s aware of a struggle within herself, an inexplicable pull toward danger, but Anna, the ultimate good girl, has always had the advantage of her angel side to balance the darkness within. It isn’t until she turns sixteen and meets the alluring Kaidan Rowe that she discovers her terrifying heritage and her willpower is put to the test. He’s the boy your daddy warned you about. If only someone had warned Anna.

Forced to face her destiny, will Anna embrace her halo or her horns?

This book has everything I hate. I'm not kidding.

1. An idiotic, annoying heroine.
2. A love triangle.
3. More telling than showing.
4. Info dumps.
5. Douchebag love interest.
6. Things that happen that make no logical sense at all. 

The things I could say about this book... If you saw my comments as I read, well, you'd understand. I'm surprised this has such a high rating. Because of it, I had high expectations, and they all came crashing down the moment Anna opened her mouth and started talking about her appearance, how she was soooo plain. But I kept going, hoping that maybe Kaidan, the love interest, would redeem the story. I mean, if you're going to throw good and evil together, there should be some serious chemistry, right?

WRONG.

All Kaidan turns out to be is a knife-wielding, wannabe bad boy who lays every girl in a ten mile radius under the pretense of "working." I found his need to have sex with at least one girl every night extremely distasteful, since he wasn't being forced into it, as shown by his later ability to just drop his work whenever he chooses.

But Anna still chooses to follow him like a simpering puppy.

You know why this book is 1 star? I'll tell you why. The main character.

People expect stuff from young adult books nowadays. They expect a girl who can kick asses and take names as well as she can pull off a ballgown, who's as smart as she's pretty.

I don't expect that. Sure, it's nice, but it's becoming the norm, and I want something different. Anna could have been that, but she failed completely. Here are some quotes that show just how insufferable she is:

A vibrant energy rushed through my body as the pieces slammed into place. Oh, dear Lord. I was in love with him. And there wasn’t a thing on earth, in heaven, or in hell that could have stopped me.

Spare me. She barely knows the guy. He's the first guy she's been attracted to, and she's ready to face heaven and hell? Bella Stewart, come on down! I think we've found you a buddy.

We couldn’t just stand there loitering. I made a quick decision to trust them and hoped it wouldn’t turn out to be one of my naive moments.

So. She decides to go into the company of potentially dangerous people to avoid LOITERING? Priorities, girl. Sort them.

“Look, Jay, I’m going to be honest with you, even though it’s embarrassing. I’m one step away from stalking him.” My voice shook. “All I do is think of him. If there were no such thing as caller ID, I would call him all day just to listen to him talking on his voice mail. I’m having an extremely difficult time getting over him. If I see him again...”

DOES SHE HAVE ANY COMMON SENSE? DON'T SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

What's probably even worse is Jay's reply, which is: "'Sorry, man... It's cool.'"

But it doesn't stop there...

I dealt with the pain by shutting down. The more time asleep, the better. I missed school a few times, just to lie in bed. Failed a major test. Lost weight. But I knew time would heal the ache, and everything would be okay. I could move on. I would come back to life. Eventually. But not yet.

Remind you of anyone yet? Take the vampires and replace them with angels, and voila! You get Sweet Evil. There is nothing about this book that's interesting in the least. Not crybaby Anna and her pathetic obsession with Kaidan, who basically strings her around and gets laid every night anyway. Oh, and he also makes "masculine growing sounds" and gives her "crushing stares," not that I have any idea what any of those mean.

Not her best friend, Jay, who acts like a wannabe gangster and cheats on his somewhat-girlfriend. And not her friends, who represent sins and don't really give a crap about the chaos they induce.

There was also too much drinking and substance abuse in this for me to be okay with it. If Higgins was trying to teach us anything, it was that it's easy to get fake IDs and that drinking is totally okay as long as we know when to stop. Also, you can apparently dump illegal drugs out of your car window...

I'm pretty sure the people who know when to stop wouldn't be drinking in the first place.

The idea with the Dukes and their children was an interesting one, but Higgins has botched it in a way that's so annoyingly stereotypical that I was begging for the book to end and put me out of my misery. The writing is subpar, with words that don't really mean anything and illogical sentences that make no sense. I wouldn't have read on, but Higgins pulled a dirty trick. The relationship between Anna and Kaidan reaches no closure, and if there's one thing I can't deal with, it's unclosed relationships. So I'll be reading on. Hopefully, Anna will get over herself (not likely), and Kaidan will stop being a douche (even more unlikely).
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Review: The Selection by Kiera Cass

Book:  The Selection
Author: Kiera Cass
Series: The Selection
Pages: 327
Publishing Date: April 24th, 2012
Publisher: Harper Teen
My rating: 1 Star

Goodreads Summary:

For thirty-five girls, the Selection is the chance of a lifetime. The opportunity to escape the life laid out for them since birth. To be swept up in a world of glittering gowns and priceless jewels. To live in the palace and compete for the heart of the gorgeous Prince Maxon.

But for America Singer, being Selected is a nightmare. It means turning her back on her secret love with Aspen, who is a caste below her. Leaving her home to enter a fierce competition for a crown she doesn't want. Living in a palace that is constantly threatened by violent rebel attacks.

Then America meets Prince Maxon. Gradually, she starts to question all the plans she's made for herself- and realizes that the life she's always dreamed of may not compare to a future she never imagined.

May I present to everyone The Hunger Games...Girlified!
Disclaimer: Despite the fact that I am drawing comparisons between the two, there is no way that this sad little novel (if it can even be called that) will ever match up to The Hunger Games.

Similarity #1: A "cutthroat" competition in which only one winner will be left standing.
Why It's Girlified: Instead of engaging in bloody struggles to the death, the girls instead compete by wearing prettier dresses, better makeup, and having etiquette. The closest they get to violence is when one bitch-slaps the other.

Similarity #2: A poor heroine who seems like an unfeeling douche in the beginning but somehow manages to endear herself to the public with her antics.
Why It's Girlified: America Singer (this name. I can't even.) is the most self-centered, weepy little twit I've ever read about. She does multiple things that would be considered horrible if others had done them, such as badmouthing the prince, throwing tantrums, but somehow the prince loves her and wants to be her best friend (because he's as stupid as she is, probably), and the public adores her.
This quote basically sum up her dazzling personality:

His black T-shirt was worn to threads in several places, just like the shabby pair of jeans he wore almost every day. If only I could sit and patch them up for him. That was my great ambition.

First selling off virginity, then this. This book is doing leaps and bounds for femininity, let me tell ya.

Similarity #3: The love triangle between the boy back home and the new boy whose personality the MC comes to know and adore.
Why It's Girlified: I can't make a decision between Aspen and Maxon. Why? Because I would rather make no decision at all. Neither of them have desirable qualities besides their broad shoulders and strong fingers. Cass needs to learn that just because the guys are hot doesn't mean they won't act like sticks of wood.

We have Aspen:
He ripped back my blankets in a move both graceful and violent.

I was internally screaming RAPE at this part. Love of my life or no, I don't want him ripping my sheets off me after I hesitated over answering whether or not I loved someone else.

We have Maxon:
He had his own smell, a mix of chemicals that burned out from him.

Do any of you find the fact that Maxon is toxic attractive? Because I don't.

Basically, what I'm saying is that this book has obvious aspects that come from The Hunger Games. However, it is also so girlified, teenybopperified, and altogether stupidified that these features have become almost unrecognizable. The writing is clumsy. It goes sort of like this:

Yesterday I brushed my teeth. I looked out my window and saw my boyfriend with his arms around another girl. Tears welled in my eyes. I smiled. I smiled again. I whisper-yelled at him. It took a while for me to rest, since I was so tired.

It's so painfully elementary that I wanted to slam my head against a tile.

Anyway. Please don't be like me, in that others' countless negative reviews weren't enough to convince you this book is utter crap. Because it is. Even the ending is crap. I might have been a bit more lenient if Cass hadn't finished what she'd started this book for. I don't even get what the conflict was. And there was no anticlimactic finale. There was no climax AT ALL. The plot is just a straight, boring line to nowhere. There were some iffy mentions of rebels and America's doubts about Illéa (doesn't make any sense to me why that makes this a dystopian, but whatever), but that's all overshadowed by the pressing concern of getting the attentions of some prince who doesn't know jack about his own country but still manages to make spur-of-the-moment, groundbreaking decisions. Oh, and he claims to know nothing about girls and to be afraid of their crying, but he manages to say all the right things and bring them all into giggly puddles of goo? This is disgusting and unflattering. I'm sure I speak for most women when I say that not all of us are reduced into pathetic tear-streaked damsels because of some guy.

I tried to read this like a chick lit. I did. But I doubt even my swoony, easily convinced self would've liked this.

My computer erased my previous review, which was already 3/4 written, which makes me hate this book even more.



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