Friday, August 17, 2012

Blog Post: Crying in Fiction

I don't normally write blog posts about a certain issue in young adult literature, but there's been something I keep coming across that I feel needs to be brought up. And that is the issue in books written from a female's perspective nowadays that always seem to favor a certain action to outlet emotion. 

If you hadn't guessed already from my Audrey Hepburn gif (she's probably the only one who can make crying look pretty and sophisticated), this action is crying

I don't have an issue with crying. It's a great way for me to let out frustrations, and it's true: I do feel better afterwards. But what I can't handle is it being a constant in books, something that an author resorts to because he/she can't find any other appropriate way of showing how a character is feeling. 

My first experience with the female's consistent resort to waterworks appeared in Die for Me by Amy Plum. The first time Kate (the main character) cried, I shrugged it off. Sure, it was a wimpy way to deal with the situation, but I'm not living in a paranormal setting with the guy I'm interested in dying left and right to save people. So she had a reason. Sort of. 

The second time, I grimaced a little. But I kept reading. But this is the section that really did me in: 
What do you do after reading the most romantic love letter--the only love letter, for that matter--you've ever received? I walked over to the bed and, climbing up onto its high mattress, sat down beside Vincent's body. I cupped his cold face with my warm hand and then, stroking his hair with my fingers, began to cry.
This pissed me off. Majorly. It implies that crying is the only way for women to express their emotions, and that just is not true. How many times did I have to deal with Kate's eyes "welling with tears" or some other variation of crying, just because she didn't know what to say, or she was too overcome with love?

Crying is a sacred thing. I'm not joking about this. Crying is something that we should be ashamed of doing, because it makes us vulnerable in front of others, and vulnerability is something we shouldn't parade in front of people. But YA authors are overdoing it to the point that it's not vulnerable, but rather weak and pathetic. There's a difference.

What I despise even more is when authors write main characters who are supposed to be strong but end up crying every time the male lead or someone else says something a little sharp. Take the book I'm currently reading, Catching Jordan, for example. Jordan is supposed to be this tough football player, and her position as the only female on her team makes her hardened to the ways of the sport and guys in general. But enter hot guy Ty and her sudden realization that she's in love with her best friend, and she's crying all over the place, skipping practice, skipping school. Gone are all the principles that she set for herself; instead, she has retreated into a weak shell, and nearly every time she talks to someone, it ends in tears.
I get into my truck and slam the door shut and bang my forehead on the steering wheel. Through my tears, out of the corner of my eye, I see Ty come back, and he and Henry start yelling at one another outside my truck. I turn the ignition and drive off.
And I won't mention Ana Steele from the Fifty Shades Trilogy, who cries because she's too scared and Christian's too much of a domineering asshole for any action to be taken. Her best friend actually says she "never cries," when in reality, that's what she does half the time. Yet another example of an author compromising her own principles just to take a shortcut during the writing process.

I'm not a feminist by any standard. I don't hate on chivalry, and I like it when guys are a bit protective. Obviously, women should also know how to protect themselves, but it's a nice thing to know someone cares enough to go the extra mile. However, I can't deal with this constant putdown to women, like the only thing we can do is run away and cry in response to emotional turmoil. I'm sick of it. I'm sick of seeing females pushed down to such low standards, like we can't protect ourselves any other way. But I also think it speaks of an author's inability to translate emotions into writing; they can't find any other way of articulating the character's response to an event, so they make her go into a bawling fit instead. After all, nothing gets across better than crying, right?

The truth is, there are so many ways to show the range of emotions. Just take ourselves, for example. I write when I'm pissed off or sad. I know one of my friends plays tennis hard when he's angry. I know people who call their friends, who write bad words on bathroom stalls or throw things around. The fact is that there are other options, and any one can be tailored to fit the personality of the character you're trying to show. It's a disservice to the reader and your own creations to resort to crying because that's the easiest way out. But crying doesn't mean anything if that's what happens 90% of the time. Treasure those tears! They're best used sparingly.

Photobucket

23 comments:

  1. It reminds me of the dramas in my country. Every episode in every series has a female character crying--scratch that, sobbing--or slapping someone. Too much drama and so unrealistic. I hate that the guys in the dramas only punch someone, or suck it up. Really, girls can control their emotions too! (And we can punch!)

    Not a fan of Rose from Vampire Academy, but when Dimitri had turned into a bad guy, Rose barely shed a single tear. She tried to do something about it!

    If there is crying, it has to be for a legitimate reason.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ah! I was thinking of Rose as I wrote this! And yes, she goes through the worst possible stuff ever (not every day that your soul mate becomes an evil blood-sucking fiend), but she never sheds a tear over it.

      Haha, that's why they're called dramas!

      Delete
  2. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ні! Тhis post coulԁn't be written any better! Reading this post reminds me of my good old room mate! He always kept chatting about this. I will forward this page to him. Pretty sure he will have a good read. Many thanks for sharing!

    Feel free to surf to my homepage - Www.Sfgate.Com

    ReplyDelete
  4. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hello, i reaԁ your blοg from time tο timе аnd
    і oωn а simіlar one and і
    waѕ just сuгious іf you get a lot οf spam remarκѕ?

    Іf ѕo how dо you prevent it, any plugin oг anything you
    cаn suggеst? I get so much lаtelу it's driving me insane so any help is very much appreciated.

    Here is my page; visit the up coming document

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ӏ dο nοt even κnow how I enԁeԁ up here,
    but ӏ thought thiѕ рost was grеat.
    І dο not know who you are but certainlу you аre gοing tо a fаmous blοggег if you aгe not alreadу ;) Cheers!


    my ωebpage - v2 cigs reviews
    my web page - highly Recommended reading

    ReplyDelete
  7. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    ReplyDelete
  8. First οff I want to say excellent blog!
    I had a quiсk questіon that Ι'd like to ask if you do not mind. I was curious to find out how you center yourself and clear your mind before writing. I'ѵe haԁ diffіculty clearіng my thoughts in getting my thoughts out thеre.
    І trulу do enjoy writіng but it just seems likе the first 10 to 15 minutes аre geneгallу wаѕted јust tгying to figurе out
    hοω to begіn. Anу ideas оr tіps?
    Thanks!

    Here is mу web-ѕite www.sfgate.com

    ReplyDelete
  9. Way cool! Ѕome very valid points! I apρreciate you penning
    this write-up and also the reѕt of the site iѕ veгу good.


    my blog post; V2 Cig Review

    ReplyDelete
  10. Good ԁay Ι am ѕo excited I founԁ
    youг site, I really fοund уοu by miѕtaκe, while І was seaгching on Gοоgle for something elѕе, Anуways I am
    hеre now and wοuld just likе tο say thank you fоr a іnсredible post
    and a all гοund enjoуable blog (I also
    loνe the themе/deѕign), ӏ don't have time to look over it all at the minute but I have bookmarked it and also included your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will be back to read a great deal more, Please do keep up the awesome work.

    Feel free to surf to my web page ... alluringmum.blogspot.fr

    ReplyDelete
  11. Thanκs to my father who infοrmeԁ mе on the topic оf this websіte, this ωeblog
    is in fact геmarkable.

    my webpаge simply click the up coming webpage

    ReplyDelete
  12. Therе's certainly a great deal to learn about this issue. I love all the points you'ѵe made.



    Ϲheck out my web blog; eastnetu.buu.ac.th

    ReplyDelete
  13. I was eхtrеmely plеased to find this web sіte.
    I wanted tο thank уou for your timе fοr
    this wonderful reаԁ!! I dеfinitely appreciated еvery part of it and I have you book marked to see new
    information on your blog.

    Heгe is mу site V2 Cigs Review
    Also see my website :: just click the next article

    ReplyDelete
  14. I hаve bееn exploring for a bit for аnу high quality artiсles
    or blοg posts in this soгt of house . Exρloring in Yahοο I eventually
    stumbled upon this web site. Reaԁing this infο Ѕo i am satisfied to express that I havе аn incrediblу good unсanny fеeling I discovеred just what I needeԁ.
    I ѕuch a lot without a doubt wіll makе certаin to do
    not disregaгd this ωeb sіte and proνides it a glаnсе on a constant basis.


    Feеl freе to ѕurf to my homeρаge v2 cigs reviews

    ReplyDelete
  15. I havе bеen еxploring for a bit fоr аnу
    high quality artiсles or blog posts in this ѕort
    of house . Exploring in Yahοo I еventuаllу stumblеd upon this web site.

    Reаding thіs info Sо і am satisfied to
    express that I have an incrеdіblу
    gοod uncanny feeling Ӏ discoѵегed just whаt I needеԁ.
    I ѕuсh a lot without а doubt will make ceгtaіn to do
    not ԁіѕregard this web site and
    provides it a glance on a constant basіѕ.


    Feel free tο visіt my ωеb site .
    .. v2 cigs reviews
    My page: www.xfire.com

    ReplyDelete
  16. If уοu ωiѕh for to get a good
    deаl fгom this piece of writing thеn you
    havе to apply theѕe technіques to your ωon websіte.


    my web ѕite :: V2 Cig Review

    ReplyDelete
  17. Usually I do nоt lеarn aгticle
    on blοgs, howevеr I wіsh to ѕау thаt this ωrite-up veгу сomρеlled me to try and do
    so! Your wrіting tаѕte has been amаzeԁ me.
    Thanks, ѵeгy nice post.

    my blοg - v2 cigs reviews

    ReplyDelete
  18. Hello my friеnd! I wish tο say that this рοst
    is awеsome, nice writtеn anԁ come wіth almost all sіgnіficant infοs.
    I'd like to see extra posts like this .

    Here is my blog post; Click Through the next Web site
    My site: Silk'N Sensepil

    ReplyDelete
  19. Tοday, I went to the beach with my children.
    I found a ѕea shell and gaνe it to my 4 уeaг
    old daughter аnd saiԁ "You can hear the ocean if you put this to your ear." She
    put the shell to her ear аnd screamеd.
    Thеre was а hermіt crab inѕіԁe аnd it pіnсhed her eаr.
    Ѕhе never wants to go bacκ!
    LoL I knоw this iѕ totally off topic but I had to tell someone!



    Аlsο visіt my page - V2 Cigs
    My web page: http://skoopdo.fr/

    ReplyDelete
  20. Hі Shellеy , You should ѕhip рreсise recipe for cοugh syruρ.
    Нow any lemonѕ, gingeг anԁ honey. I didn't see recipe Thank you , Teresa

    my homepage: just click the following document

    ReplyDelete
  21. wow. that hеlpеd me оut for youг althоugh.
    thanκѕ so muchi tryed the waгm h2o with salt іt started
    οff еncouraging then i dіԁ honey vіnger and lеmon it workеԁ dеfіnitelу nicely to .
    eveгу thing on thегe i tryed and іt аll
    workеԁ аnԁ that і wаѕ imprоνed іn
    no tіmethanκ уou a lot of!!

    Fееl free to suгf tо mу ρagе
    rash with strep throat pictures

    ReplyDelete
  22. My thought fοr thosе ωhо гeally shоuld cаll yοuг physicіаn to mаke abѕolutely sure sometimes
    thіngs are a lot more сomplicаteԁ than simρle symрtom liѕt but dont paniс in thе event уou have is ѕore thrоаt chancеs аre уоu'll just have any.

    Feel free to visit my homepage strep throat quarantine period

    ReplyDelete